Gavron’s Guide to Weapons

The below was written by Guy Dyson, probably to fill in a gap at the bottom of a page, in the 1992 CIA Annual, that year called Perpendicular Worlds. Transcribed by Doug Burbidge.

Gavron’s Guide to Weapons

In most role playing games, people read equipment lists and choose weapons based on cost, damage etc. but rarely do people know much about the weapons themselves. This guide will help with some simple descriptions of weapons used in role playing games.

2 Handed Sword: What John Cleese uses in The Holy Grail.
Short Sword: What John Cleese uses in Life of Brian.
Dagger: What John Cleese uses in Erik The Viking.
Long Sword: What John Cleese uses in The Holy Grail.
Bastard Sword: What John Cleese uses in Conan the Barbarian.
Micro-phone: What John Cleese uses in Clockwise.
Long Bow: What John Cleese uses in Time Bandits. (Or at least would have, if the scenes where he used it hadn’t been cut.)
Razor: What John Cleese uses in The Meaning of Life.
Light Saber: What John Cleese uses in Star Wars.

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