Swancon 14 – Progress Report 4 – Summary

Descriptions and transcriptions by Elaine Walker this time. As ever, typos faithfully replicated, and layouts and formats approximated only as much as can be done with trivial amounts of html.

As with the second and third progress reports for SwanCon 14, the fourth progress report is a 12 A4 page saddle stapled booklet. In addition, there are a number of inserts:

  • White/cream A4 single sided Hotel Booking Form. ($79/night single, double and twin and $89/night Triple room) since apparently we were doing the hotel booking stuff back then.
  • White/cream A4 single sided General Booking Form – for becoming a member, booking a banquet ticket, reserving a huckster’s table, entering the art show, submitting a programme item or academic paper.
  • White/cream A4 double sided 1989 Australian Science Fiction Achievement Awards Ditmars Voting Form. May record this information elsewhere

The actual booklet itself has artwork on the front cover (which I am calling page 1, no actual pages are numbered) of what looks like a man with a ray gun and a pith helmet coming across a futuristic looking set of buildings with the caption:
Distinguished Urbanologist Discovers New City on Tau Ceti 5
This, along with most of the artwork was apparently done by Annette Wilson, there is also a picture of a -Dead Dog Party- Monday Night (dogs lying on floor or acting as coffee table, guests appear to be cats). And on page 11 a Gulliver commits urbicide! with a giant pointing a big cannon at a town of tiny people. There is also a serpentine looking creature on page 3 and a unicorn on page 8, both drawn by Kiera McKenzie.

Inside the front cover has the current membership rates ($70 for attending; $20 for supporting; $5 for voting and if you turn up at the door $80 for full and $20 and $10 for day and night memberships respectively); advertising rates for the programme books, rates for the Huckster tables, and who is on the committee, which I’m pretty sure has been covered already.

Page 3 had a report on a quiz night, advance notification about the Theatre Sports to run on the Friday of the Con, information about the Auction(s) and an announcement about a Lucasfilms Display (stills from various Lucasfilms productions to be displayed during the con).

Pages 4-5 contained information on The Fan Dance; The Banquet; The Masquerade and the Masked Ball (which are all apparently different things this convention) as well as information about costume weapons. Some of these may be described in later posts.

Pages 6-7 had the Programme so far, from which I gather there were streams in a Main Hall and Second Hall, the Video Room, and some reference to the Games Room.

Page 9 was devoted to Hotel Booking information, Parking information, and the information that there was a swimming pool available, but that access may be revoked if the congoers made nuisances of themselves. Also an advert for a fanzine called ‘Get Stuffed #3’

Page 10 had to do with the art show. Page 11 with the ‘how to get there’ for interstate attendees using an airline that no longer exists.

Pages 12 and 8 contained the membership list which is now up to 185 people. (The first 170 are listed on page 12, and the final 15 are listed at the top of page 8.)

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Fannish History Panel – Continuum 13 – 2017

by Elaine Walker

I went to the panel on Fandom History at Continuum 13 (Triskaidekaphilia) in Melbourne in 2017. Originally it was meant to be a panel on Fandom: Where Did We Come From? Aussiecon 1975, but they had some extra people there who remembered earlier, so the focus of the panel was mostly on Fandom in Australia in the 1950s. The panelists, as far as I can remember, were: Rob Gerant – Assistant editor of Australian SF review; Dick Jenssen – founding Australian SF club (meteorologist?) fond of games, inventor of Ditmar; Lee Harding – involved in fanzines and Leigh Edmonds – former fanzine writer, now writing a history on fandom 1956-1975.

This panel did appear to be recorded, but as yet has not appeard on the continuumcon youtube channel (though I do recommend the GoH speeches which are on there). So this is based on the brief notes that I made during the panel.

Leigh mentioned iOTA which is an efanzine about his project  to write the history of fandom. The supplement Australian Fandom Adventures in Time of iOTA 7can be found at the above link and was available in hard copy at the panel. It contains the timeline from 1927-1966 and some photos.

There was some discussion about how the panelists had got into SF fandom. Leigh Edmonds was stuck in bed for a number of weeks with pneumonia and his parents gave him Dan Dare comics which introduced him to SF. He remembered that George Turner was grabbed by Amazing Stories.

Dick couldn’t remember a time when he wasn’t interested in the strange and usual while his father was a SF fan but pretended he wasn’t. Race Matthews grew up with SF and he pointed out to Dick that the school library had SF books and that the History of Time and Space was buyable in the city. In those days it was not cool to be a nerd (drongo, wet weed, dill)… it was a non-technological society and SF was not approved of. In the 1950 very little SF was to be found in bookshops but the library bound SF american magazines and loaned them for 6p a time.

Melbourne Science Fiction Club (MSFC) was discussed. It was considered to be strange by the generl population  and a comparison was made to jazz clubs in the 1950/1952 era according to Australian Fandom Adventures in Time.

Lee Harding felt like an outsider and found a niche in SF Fandom.

Franklins (the library mentioned above) had fanzines and letter columns. Operation Fantast Magazines got sent to Ken (Jeffreys) by American fans and then distributed from there.

Dick considered that MSFC was the best therapy / support group for someone not sure of their place in the world. He did some basic physics and apparently used the first computer at university to do weather modelling.

Rob, a more recent convert (1966) found out about the Australian SF Review when McGills went to find it and Merv Binns was there. Rob had scientific interests at home while his library had the yellow Gollancz SF hardback classics. The literature that he read was mostly about family and people interactions, but SF helped him look at a bigger part of the world.

Dick stated that in the 1950s and 1960s he was in to very subversive literature – e.g. the Lovers by JSF Human ( alien insect love). The books encouraged acceptance of each other, while the normal world view around that time was restrictive.

There was a discussion about the signs of creativity in fans with the two main ones being producing fanzines and wanting to write Science Fiction.

Etherline was an early magazine/fanzine and a stack of which were sent around the room for people to look at and keep, provided they promised not to dump it in the bin larter. I took Issue 72.

In the initial SF meetings nearly everyone had, or wanted to write science fiction. Lee had been reading New World etc. and ended up writing, in same place as JG Ballard

Blue air mail letters were used for international correspondence as there were no local SF markets.

It was noted that it was important to have your own inbuilt shit detector to enable you to read your own work critically because there was no one else around who could.

There was a mention of Space Age Books run by Merv Binns, which was opposite the library of the university. The university itself proving to be a very good source of customers for the bookshop.

Dick tried writing and decided five pages in that he couldn’t write another 200, so he produced  a couple of SF stories for Perhaps(sp?) but found that he prefers drawing.

Rob did some writing. Bruce had written a lot on Philip K. Dick with his first book being published by Australian Press. At that point they set up the first Australian SF press which included such writers as Greg Egan and Damien Broderick. Together they produced a book on Australian SF from the 50s up.

Rob thought that the snobbery of the establishment was the reason fans had to set up their own publisher / press because the main publishers were not much interested. It appears this has not changed a great deal. For example Penguin are not hugely interested but Harper Collins are now doing a fair bit.

Dick said that SF changed his life, without it he would not have gone on to do physics and use computers. His interest only fell away when his job became more fun.

Lee got solidarity and support for his work but stopped writing and reading 30 years ago. He felt that SF had done its job for him.

Rob thought that SF had enriched his whole life, not just when he sold part of his collection. *grins*

Short summary of Etherline Issue 72

Etherline Science Fiction Journal was published by AFPA (Amateur Fantasy Publications of Australia). It had agents in USA, West and East Coasts, and the UK. It cost 6 pence (6D). A specific date was not given but based on the contents it was published sometime in the last half of 1956.

Issue 72 had on its cover a picture of a crashed spaceship with a robot and a human who was aiming a gun at the robot.

Featuring: (hand written note)
Fletcher Pratt Dies in USA
Nova Novels Suspended
New Mag From Ziff Davis?
Adelaide and Brisbane News

Internal page (2) was an advert for the 5th Australian Science Convention in Melbourne, December 8th and 9th, 1956.

Page 3 was Adelaide News.
Pages 4-9 was an Author Story Listing (32) for Fletcher Pratt compiled by Donald H. Tuck, apparently Fletcher had passed on recently.
Page 9 – the latter half was a short note on the irregularity of Etherline of late and how they hoped this would be fixed soon.
Page 10 had the first instance of Nova News, by E. J. Carnell and also had information about a Convention in London, and the suspension of Noval Novels. There was also an Illustration by McIntyre.
Page 11 – Advert for what was currently in at McGills
Pages 12-13 contained information on a new quarterly magazine called Tomorrow: the World of Science Fiction.
Page 14 had information about the Blue Centaur Book Company and Operation Fantast.
Page 15-16 had Book Reviews (Deep Space by Eric Frank Russell; Escape to Venus by S. Makepeace Lott)
Page 17-18 had Magazine Reviews (Fate; Science Fiction Monthly; Astounding Science Fiction)
Page 19 had a Global Round Up which contained information on fiction sales locals had made, incoming books, magazines that had ceased publishing, and rumoured new magazines.
Pages 20-21 had the Brisbane News.
Page 22 had Fanzine Reviews (A Minus Z Infinity; Peon 36; Umbra 12)
The final internal page, 23, had adverts for the Melbourne Science Fiction Group and someone who apparently did binding of SF collections, presumably magazines. The back page had the contact information, and a 3d Australian stamp.

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Swancon 14 – PR2 – Fandom in Perth

being a sequence of short summaries of fan activities, covering pages 7 and 8 of the second official progress report for Swancon 14. As ever, typos faithlessly reproduced; note that all contact details have been omitted, even if we think that they are defunct.

Fandom in Perth

One of the most common requests we receive is to provide information on SF-related groups and activities in Perth. We hope that this list will go some way towards fulfilling such requests. If you know of other groups or or activities not listed below, please write to us with details, and we’ll include them in the next PR.

The Cappuccino Club.

On the first Thursday of every month a large portion of the Cappuccino Bar (149 James St, cnr of James and Lake St., Northbridge) is taken over by a group of local SF fans. Here they settle down to an informal chat session, fuelled in no small way by the incredible sundaes which are the speciality of the house. This writer would like to thank the Cappuccino Bar for making the likes of the “Luna Blu” available to the general public.
Contact: Cindy Evans xxx xxxx.

The Curtin Imagination Association (C.I.A.)

The CIA is a Science Fiction and Fantasy group, based at the Curtin University of Technology.
Contact: Greg Colgan Liaison Officer CIA, [address omitted].

Dark Star.

A recently formed group, meeting on the third friday of each month from 7:30 pm at the Kid’s Open Learning School, [address omitted]. Each meeting has a central theme and feature a video of some sort with related discussion panel (eg. sex in Blake’s Seven) and group activities (e.g. pin the eyepatch on the Travis). The emphasis is placed upon enjoyment. Admission is $3.00, which also includes wine and cheese.
Contact: John Richards xxx xxxx


Standing for “Fannish Monthly”, this is a social gathering of local SF fans, usually held at members’ houses. These meetings are held on the second Saturday of each month, beginning 8pm. FM also publish The Epistle , a regular newsletter containing useful information about upcoming fannish events as well as future FM meetings.
Contact: Ann Griffiths xxx xxxx

The Faster Than Light Radio Show

Hosted by Grant Stone, this half-hour , award-winning programme can be heard every week on Tuesday at 6.30 pm and repeated on Thursday at 11 am. Tune your radio to 6UVS FM (92.1 FM). Each programme contains book and film reviews, interviews, music as well as information from the SF world.

The Grey Company

Founded in 1984, this is Perth’s Dark Ages pagentry group. The Grey Company meet every Sunday from 9am in the park beneath the Charles St exit ramp ( in Aberdeen St, opposite City Motors). This is a training session at which the group practice (non-lethal) combat with period weapons and armour. Grey Company perform combat exhibitions at schools and fairs and for charity. The traditional festivals of Midwinter and Midsummer are celebrated with feasts in the style and featuring the cuisine of the Dark Ages.
Contact: Bill McConnell xxx xxxx.

The University Science Fiction Association (UniSFA)

UniSFA has a club room on the second floor of the Guild Building at the University of Western Australia. This serves as an informal on-campus gathering place for members and is open every weekday of the University term. The club room also houses a large library of SF titles which may be borrowed by members.
Contact: Julia Copeland xxx xxxx

The Westlodge.

The local Dr. Who club, Westlodge meet on the first Saturday of each month from 1.00 pm in the Social Sciences Lecture Theatre 2 at The University of Western Australia. Admission is $1.40 which covers the day’s activities and afternoon tea.
Contact: William Duffy xxx xxxx

At the bottom of page 8, there is a mostly black square drawing, with a human figure on a unicorn on top of a bluff, looking towards the moon in a blackened sky, with irregular white grids reminiscent of suburban roads.

ed: and thus ends our transcriptions from Swancon 14 official PR 2.

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Swancon 14 – Progress report 3 – page 6

Transcribed by Chris Creagh.

The Urban Spaceman

Now, in the last PR there was an attempt to explain the idea of the Urban Spaceman. John Richards, Terry Chilvers and Gina Goddard all had a go, in response to a query from Guy Blckman. Nice. But Now The Real Story.

Frank Reginald Quill (FRQ to his friends) was born many years ago into a humble family of circus roustabouts and neo-Hegelian philosophers. In his early years, he learned tumbling, how to put up tents and feed elephants cinnamon buns, high-wire and trapeze work, and the rejection of Immanuel Kant, whom he had met one night at a drunken party, and who had propositioned him. His more formal education consisted of a doctorate from the university of Basle in the field of the Semiotics of Aristotelian Ethics and its implications for caged animals. This, naturally, lead him into the real estate.

FRQ began his real estate career with an examination of the terms of reference: why is this termed “real” estate? If this form of property is real then, employing the principle of ‘differance,’ there must be another form of property which is unreal. He argued that, since one must first possess real property in order to sell it, it is far more profitable to sell unreal property which, by its very nature, cannot be possessed. He argued further, following the ideas of Jacques Lacan, that it is, in fact, the action of selling the unreal property which gives it a form of quasi-existence, dependent upon the relation between buyer and seller.

This at least, was the defence he used when he was brought to trial on charges of fraud, laid by people who had paid him a great deal of money to buy city properties which did not exist. Fortunately for FRQ, the jury was, due to a computer malfunction, composed entirely of members of the Modern Language Association. After a trial which lasted two hours and a debate in the jury room which lasted three months, FRQ was acquitted, and simultaneously elected to the presidency of the MLA and the Chamber of Commerce Hall of Fame.

After a time, and particularly since FAQ sold his unreal estate at extremely modest prices, it became fashionable to own blocks of property in the city which only existed as a relationship between buyer and seller. People felt that it reaffirmed their existence, and FRQ became very rich selling city space that wasn’t there. Thus it was that he became the first and most succesful, Urban Spaceman.


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SwanCon 14 – PR2 – ‘So what the hell is an urban spaceman’

being a query and three response on the topic of the Urban Spaceman, covering most of page 6 of the second official progress report for Swancon 14. A small amount of space at the bottom of the page has been filled in with line drawings. On the left, there are three near identical ‘spaceman’ suits. The one on the left is the plainest, and is labelled ‘Spaceman (Generic)’; the one in the middle is standing at a bus-stop and is labelled ‘Spaceman (Urban)’; the one on the right is smoking a cigarette and saying ‘Sterling idea, what?’ and is labelled ‘Spaceman (Urbane)’. On the right, there is a different style of spaceman suit, with the individual leaning on a pole of some kind, and connected up to some big boxy thing. 

As ever, typos faithlessly reproduced

So What the Hell is an Urban Spaceman?

Guy Blackman recently wrote to us with the following complaint:

“. . . my complain concerns your theme of Swancon 14 – The Urban Spaceman. This is a very vague title and I am not sure of all that it entails. An explanation would bring great gratification. ”
Guy is, I am sure, not alone in his uncertainty. ‘The Urban Spaceman’, it’s a great theme, but what the hell does it mean? we asked some of our committee members.

John Richards

My ideas on the Urban Spaceman are unfortunately (and probably predictably), a little cynical. This is ‘cos I’ve heard that song by Neil Innes. After singing the praises of this wonder of today (“I’m a supersonic guy”) he concludes with “I’m the Urban Spaceman, here comes the twist, I don’t exist.”
I think the Urban Spaceman is the hero; taller, stronger, braver, smarter, faster and more blonde than any other. A wit, yet deep, cheery, yet with an inner understanding – upright and laidback at the same time (and not recommended by the Surgeon General). And there are hundreds who believe that they are this sex-god et. al., but they’re not. They don’t exist. There are no Urban Spacemen. Not one. It’s a myth. Zilch. (I think I’m going to cry  – ed).
But if they do exist, I’d love to meet you. Come to the ‘con, we’ll do lunch . . .

Terry Chilvers

The Urban Spaceman is one of those cleverish-sounding phrases that don’t actually mean anything in particular (except that in this case it is also the title of a song). I rather like it as a theme – I just dunno what it means. Two ideas: (1) Urban, modern settings for stories (as opposed to starships and the far future). Other Days, Other Eyes and “Press Enter ◼︎ ” rather than Orbitsville and The Ophiuchi Hotline.
(2) Armchair adventurers – frustrated wishful thinkers.
That may not be much help in suggesting masquerade costumes however . . . .

Gina Goddard

To me, the notion of the Urban Spaceman is one which is of particular interest to today’s society. The world’s population is becoming increasingly centred in urban areas and because of this new methods and styles of living are becoming necessary. As man affects his environment more and more we are also (finally) becoming aware of our impact on our world. This is the future that many SF writers have seen and already considered. We are the Urban Spacepeople.
As for masquerade costumes why not ignore the theme completely if you wish? Or, come as a piece of high density housing.

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Swancon 14 – Progress report 2 – Convention news and information (part 3 of 3)

being a sequence of small news articles, covering page 4 of the second official progress report for Swancon 14. As ever, typos faithlessly reproduced

Badge Making Service

We would like to extend our badge-making services to provide made-to-order badges to our members. If you have a slogan or design you’d like to be able to wear as a badge, just send it to us, and we’ll incorporate it into a badge for $1.50 (plus postage). Better yet, send us an appropriately sized blank (see below), save us the trouble of designing the badge and we will convert your design to a badge for only $1.00 (plus postage).

DIY Badge Designs

Almost any design can be converted to a badge, so long as it can be contained within the following dimensions: The blank must be a circle 70mm in diameter cut from paper or cartridge. Any design must fit within a central 59mm circle (do not mark this circle on the blank as it will show in the final product).

Standard Badges

We also have a series of standard designs as shown below. These are available in red, yellow, green blue or white and cost $1.00 each (plus postage).

The remaining half page consists of an array of circles, 4 circles high, and 6 wide. Each circle represents a single badge. There are two with images — a female like figure riding a zebra like animal with text “Virgin — on the ridiculous”, and two silhouetted cats on a black blob with text “Perfect harmony” — and the rest are text only. These include (but are not limited to:

  • Kylie Who?
  • REVENGE has no use by date
  • I am a honorary GUMBY
  • This is a Bicentennial road project
  • I feel a bit NORMAL today
  • Question authority – you can ask me anything
  • I’m a teapot
  • I’ve been seduced by the CHOCOLATE side of the FORCE

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Swancon 14 – Progress report 2 – Convention news and information (part 2 of 3)

being a sequence of small news articles, covering page 3 of the second official progress report for Swancon 14. As ever, typos faithlessly reproduced

Swancon Port.

We will once again be offering bottles of Swancon Commemorative Port. Bottled by Gallifrey Wines of Western Australia and featuring a distinctive “Tin Duck” label, these were very popular at Swancon 11 (the last WA NatCon).
You can reserve your bottle(s) by writing to the convention address, the price is yet to be determined.

And Then There Were Two…

Most recent highlight of Perth fannish activity were the nuptial celebrations of convention chairthingy, Cindy Evans, and Matthew Clarkson on Saturday, November 5th. Those of us lucky enough to attend the celebrations can tell you that we honestly haven’t seen the two of them look happier. They couldn’t stop smiling (or drinking champagne). The best wishes of all of Perth fandom (and much of Australian fandom) go with Cindy and Matthew. This is the first in a spate of approaching committee marriages. What some people will do to get a week off working on the con…

Wanted: More Art. More Programme Items

Thank you to those who have written suggesting programme items. We are always open to suggestions – so don’t stop writing! Thank you also to Lewis Morley, Robert Phillips and Guy Blackman for providing the artwork for this issue. All we need now is artwork for the remaining PRs and the Programme Book !

[here on the page, there is a small black portrait orientated rectangle with a white drawing, reminiscent of chalk on blackboard drawings. At the top, a stereotypical flying saucer, at the bottom right a humanoid figure with antennae, looking up at the saucer, and at the bottom left the words “oh no an alien!!” ]

Conspire ’89

The 1989 SF and Fantasy Media convention will be held in Canberra at the Metro Inn Canberra Rex Hotel between March 17 and 19 1989. Attending membership is $50 until January 1989 and $60 until March 1989, supporting membership is $10. The theme is Mystery, the official charity Foundation 41.
Fan guest of honour is Robert Jan, Pro GoH is yet to be announced.
Convention address: GPO Box 2080 Canberra ACT 2601 Australia.

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Swancon 14 – Progress report 2 – Convention news and information (part 1 of 3)

being a sequence of small news articles, covering page 2 of the second official progress report for Swancon 14. As ever, typos faithlessly reproduced

Millenium : The Movie

We reported in our last PR that John Varley had been working on a film in Toronto, Canada. Principal shooting on the film in question, Millenium (from Varley’s novel of the same name) is now complete. The script was written by Varley, and was directed by Michael Anderson. Cast includes Kris Kristofferson, Cheryl Ladd and Daniel J. Travanti (“I’ve heard that name before” department: Capt. Furillo from Hill Street Blues).
John has promised to bring a home movie The Making of Millenium to Swancon.

New Books for Bob Shaw.

Bb Shaw’s sequel to The Ragged Astronauts, The Wooden Spaceships has been released in hardcover. Publishers are Gollancz (UK) and Baen (US). Bob’s current project is a sequel to Orbitsville and Orbitsville Departure, entitled Orbitsville Judgement. Work on this novel should be completed early next year.

Swancon at the Royal Show.

Swancon and Tactics (a local gaming store) recently held a stall at the Perth Royal Agricultural Society Show, publicising both the store and the convention. Tactics bore the costs involved and put together a fine display of SF, fantasy and historical miniatures. Swancon committee members (and draftees) manned the stall, selling games and badges and distributing publicity leaflets.
From a publicity point of view, the stall was a great success in bringing both Swancon 14 and Tactics to the attention of the general public. As an added bonus, we were also able to raise a small amount of money through the sale of badges (see page 4).
We would like to extend our thanks to tactics for their continued support and for allowing us this avenue of publicity.

Introducing: The Hotel Ghost !

Parts of The Kings Ambassador are, reportedly, haunted by the ghost of a former Assistant Manager who was murdered at the hotel some years ago . This news is being taken quite seriously by the committee, and we are currently working the ghost into our programme.

Mumfan: In Memorium

One of Swancon’s most faithful and well-liked participants will not be with us in 1989. Marge Hughes, better known to all of us as “Mumfan”, passed away of cancer on the 25th of September. Marge has been a part of Swancon longer than most of us – somehow it will never be the same.

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Swancon 14 – Progress report 1 – page 10

Transcribed by Doug Burbidge.

Pages 9 and 10 are guest bios, each about two thirds of a page. The third of the three is:

Paul J. Stevens

Paul Stevens has been involved in the SF community since 1962. In that time, he has contributed a great deal to this community. Swancon 14 has chosen to recognise this contribution, and to show our appreciation for his acheivements by inviting him to attend our convention as the Fan Guest Of Honour. Originally from Melbourne, Paul now lives here in Perth. An SF reader from an early age, his first involvement in fandom came when he joined the Melbourne Science Fiction club. Through this club he became involved in the organisation of a number of SF convention, serving in various positions including chairman.

Paul may perhaps be better known as the film character Antifan which he helped create in the early seventies. The first Antifan film was made as part of the successful 1975 bid by Melbourne fans to hold the World Science Fiction Convention in their city. The Super 8 film, in the style of old silent movies, featured the evil Antifan performing various villaneous acts in an attempt to foil the bid’s success. Other Antifan films were made to support subsequent WorldCon bids, for Sydney in 1983 and the successful bid for Melbourne in 1985.

For fifteen years, Paul worked for Melbourne science fiction bookshop Space Age Books . He is also the creator of The Golden Caterpillar Award, a personal award presented at Australian National Science Fiction Conventions. These are usually presented for humorous reasons, but have also been awarded in recognition of special effort.

Since moving to Perth, Paul has been involved in various aspects of the book trade and has continued his liaison with the SF community. We feel that Paul deserves recognition for his acheivements and thus we are proud to have him as our Fan Guest of Honour for 1989.

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Swancon 14 – Progress report 1 – Page 4

Transcribed by Doug Burbidge

How to Have a Terrible Time at a Swancon

Gina Goddard

Well, I’m sure it’s been done. I do remember hearing about one person who had an absolutely dreadful time. But that was because of his hangover. I’m sure that it’s possible to have a really bad con, I just can’t think of how.
Oh, I know. Be on the committee. That way you get someone to throw a cream pie in your face. Great fun, heh?
What’s that?
It all depends on your point of view?
I suppose the best way to not enjoy yourself is to avoid participating in anything. Don’t come to the masquerade, better still don’t enter it. That way you’re sure to ruin a few hours.
Whatever you do don’t participate in the fan olympics. I mean can you think of anything much worse than horizontal mountain climbing?
You can?
Welllll, what about the dance? All that exertion and unseemly behaviour? Yuck.
You think you’d quite enjoy that?
Okay then, what about the gaming, the band, the auction, the vegemite shield, fannish theatre sports,the video stream, the academic programme, the cocktail party, the Ditmars, the banquet, the filksinging, the fact that the other members of the convention keep on talking to you and being friendly? I could go on and on.
From what you can gather it sounds like fun?
If you’re not careful you’ll end up enjoying yourself.

And that IS what Swancon is all about. Five days to have a good time.
You really can’t have a terrible time at a Swancon.


Fan Funds

Fan Funds blah blah blah DUFF GUFF FFANZ a third of a page.

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